NJ

Two weeks ago, we finally met with the lawyer about securing as many protections for baby girl as possible.  We were able to both adopt A in WI as long as I first severed my rights as a bio mom.  (Totally, not awesome that I had to do so, but two legal parents is way better than one.)

So, we knew that MI would in no way offer us any such options. We had also found out a few weeks prior that a guardianship would not even be an option, which was VERY upsetting.  So, when we met with our lawyer, we were hoping to hear that there was something we could do other than moving to another state to establish residency over the course of 3-6 months and then pursue a second parent adoption.

We learned that there are three states in the United States of America that claim jurisdiction based on place of birth when it comes to second parent adoption: New Jersey, Texas, and Washington.  (Texas? - anyone care to explain? Austin only? I have so much to learn!)  So, as of mid-May (early June due date), we are packing up and taking an extended vacation to NJ to birth and begin second parent adoption paperwork.  It is our understanding that we won't even have to return to the state after the initial filing.  We will just pay big bucks to the lawyer there and then wait for the confirmation paperwork in the mail.  Given our other options, sounds pretty easy.

The irony of all of this (well, there are many ironies, actually, but we shall focus on just one for today) is that we moved back to MI from WI to be near our family.  A's birth was so traumatic for me, and having family six hours away only enhanced the terror/fear etc... I/we had.  We thought we'd move home and never have to be away from our family for anything big again.  Well, obviously not so.

The good news is that E's dad will be coming with us. He's always an amazing support system, and we are fortunate that he will be able to journey with us on yet another adventure. We will need him, for sure.

We are meeting with the lawyer again tomorrow. Lots to learn, plan, and accomplish in the next few months. If only my pregnant brain would go away so that I could do all three!

Our girl

Yup that is right, we are having a girl! Here are a few glimpses of our sweet girl.

A update

Countdown to the u/s continues.  We are waiting with great- and I do mean GREAT- anticipation.

In other news, A is everything amazing.  He is still telling us that he is not "big", he's a " big brother".  He's also been telling us that "Pa" (E's dad) is his dad.  He did finally tell her that he would "share."  I think it's interesting that he's managed to fill in the pieces to his own story, and grandpa is absolutely flattered.  Everybody wins (especially since E still gets to "share" him!)  Today he told my sister to "be careful, and don't cut yourself, K!" as she sliced him some apple.  He also read a book to his very brand new cousin Z.

I love how he "reads" now.  He loves to spell - stringing random letters together- and then tell us what that spells.  For example, "xkrpa spells airplane!"  He has moved on from loving pink, to loving purple. He loves to cook, and in giving up his pacificers this week he chose a battery power mixer and cookie cutter set as his prize. He also loves his tools and garbage trucks, oh and the Little People Bus is still one of his very favorite- going on two years now! He's also proud that he can make us feel "happy" or "better" by giving us hugs and telling us he loves us. He's the sweetest.

I could go on and on.  I could tell you that the teachers at his pre-school (it's a parent participation program) were absolutely surprised at his drawing ability this week as well as his ability to retain information (raisins come from grapes!).  I do go on and on, I guess.  I'm going to be one of those annoying moms who thinks her children are perfect... (he won't sing the alphabet- STILL, he is painfully shy, and is terrible at catching a ball.  See, I can see the truth!)

He's the most amazing thing in my life, and since I actually slept a bit last night, I truly enjoyed my day with him.  It felt really good to be loving my job again.  It is, by far, the best one I've ever had.

or does it?

Does the ring test use circles for girls or boys?  Perhaps this is why it always works: no one knows if circles are girl or boy!

Our two friends are both having boys and both got circles.  We got lines.  Maybe it's a girl afterall!

Boy or Girl?

As I mentioned in my previous post, I am sick of hearing that we are going to have a girl.  Not so much because it's impossible, but because the fortunetellers are so adamant about their predictions.  Why do they have to be so sure? It's my body and our baby?

Well, over here at the Village, we have been far less than sure.  With everyone around us working so hard to convince us we are having a girl, we've been rather ambivalent in our own predictions. That being said, we are ravenous to know if our little Twig is a boy or a girl.  We've been starting to organize baby things, including a few girl things we've collected from my sister who has two older girls.  The wanting to know is wearing us!

So, in my internet research, it seems that most non-ultrasound prediction methods are easily discredited, including the dra.no test and the how-do-you-carry-test.  (In my own anecdotal experience, it does seem to work overall, but I've also noticed that people that carry babies a particular way carry both their girls and their boys that way, which suggests there is perhaps another correlating factor- but that's for someone else to determine.)  However, the internets seems to be relatively convinced that the ring test actually works.

So.... the ring predicts that those convinced "girl" are wrong. I guess we'll know in a couple of weeks. Argh! 21 weeks u/s is so far away!

18 weeks and counting! A potpourri of baby thoughts.

Life is going well enough here. We will be 19 weeks on Monday, and two weeks from Tuesday we finally have our ultrasound where we hopefully find out boy/girl. I don't have any feelings, and neither does E, but those around us seem (annoyingly) convinced that we are having a girl. Eyeroll.

Today we are working on going through old baby stuff and figuring out what we might need. We did a little BRU registry (30 items) to replace things we will need: diaper bag, new sippy cup things etc... and the co-sleeper we should have bought for A. It's been a baby-tastic day!

I'm feeling so much better. I was pretty down and out until 16 weeks, just as the holidays hit. Could be worse, I suppose. I'm healthy and we're all happy. My GD hasn't even shown up again, so I have nothing to complain about.

As it does every year, the end of the holidays marks a perfect time to recommit to being healthy. I was so ready! So, baby is eating healthfully again and E is on board too.

A is talking more and more about the baby, and that's probably b/c I'm really starting to show now (finally!) nothing like looking pregnant instead of fat. :-) A predicts a brother some days and a sister other days. Far less annoying than the other people that have such strong girl opinions. Argh! His predictions are adorable, of course. We did the ring test, and it came back boy, but who knows how reliable it is.

this post was all over, but so is my brain these days. Life is busy. Life is good.

long time no post

I'm tired. I'm nauseous. I'm 9 1/2 weeks pregnant.

We've had a busy month plus around here. We threw baby showers for my sister and for our very good friends. E is working on a new project at work that A and I are volunteering lots of time for (she works for a non profit.) In the meantime, our house has gone to hell and we're lucky to be eating food from all food groups most nights of the week.... if I can get to dinner at all.

Being pregnant this time is a lot like the first time, but the symptoms are milder. When I was pregnant with A, I was so sick nothing ever sounded good to eat. I have moments now where that's true, but mostly I'm not having any trouble eating a well-rounded diet overall. I haven't gained any weight, but my pants aren't fitting well. I got the maternity stuff out and tried to wear it, and it's too big... argh.

The worst thing so far is finding a practitioner. This area is terribly sparse in terms of midwives. We're between two cities, so right now we have an appointment with a midwife in the city we normally don't frequent. I'm worried b/c the intake nurse was an idiot, and that's being nice. Still, with so few options (and the birth center completely out), we want to give the m/w a chance before we look for something else. When we lived in WI, we had a lot more in terms of options. There are several things we miss about WI (though the recent election went about the same as it did here, so....)

Lots going on, but nothing really. I don't forget I'm pregnant, but the time does seem to be going faster - probably due in part to not feeling AS sick as I did the first time (we're just talking on continuum though. don't get me wrong, I am still anxious to feel good again.) It is probably also going faster because I am kept very busy by a very busy little boy, who recently told me, "I not a big boy, I a big brother!"

Love him. Love him!